im going to pretend it doesnt matter, it doesnt hurt and things have always been the way they are. after all, it really doesnt matter, it really doesnt hurt, and things have always been the same. the sun rises from the east and sets in the west, just like how i go to bed and wake the same as before - nothing changes. or maybe they do, but im already oblivious to it. and thats how things should stay, how feelings should be, how subtle hints should just die away into oblivion. because nothing on earth is real. were all living a lie.

we are all lies.

havent i said enough?


*


not being sad or anything, maybe just a little pathetic but i always wonder why i dont belong. its like, im there but im not there. one moment im in it and another im not. and nobody notices. and i thank god that im pretty blind/oblivious to it.

i like things like that.

i should stop trying so hard. its wasting my effort/energy. and nobody sees. maybe they do but they arent putting in enough effort. well, its not like i would put in effort so i guess its what i reap.

im just a sad piece of pathetic junk. as usual. i should really just create/walk my own path already. one far away from everyone.

because its not like you, my dear reader, would care much anyway. if you do, youre lying to yourself. dont even try to try.

:D